Now, I have no preconceptions,
an image, of the former me, hangs crookedly
on the fireplace and window cill.
Each morning, I gaze at the image of the former me
It was that specific revelation, of untruth,
that co-conspiratated my collapse.
So effortlessly, they set me up, to disappoint.
Time and time again, I tried, never knowing
I was knee deep in treachery.
Shocked by the sudden silence
of my formerly agitated soul,
I felt calm, for the first time.
A chunk of ore in a mine full of diamonds
the former me was simply over-looked.
The treasures of her life did not even fill the car
A bag of clothes
A sack full of cassette tapes
A Beatles tray from 1950
A Life Magazine featuring fifty years of Marylin Monroe
A stench of desire to find somewhere to belong
A life left behind less than normal
Wondering from behind the wheel about which path to choose
She hopes it will not be full of unsavory characters covered in madness
She hopes it will not be a simple existence without living or loving
She hopes it will not be full of love, understanding but lacking imagination
She hopes it will not be full of excess and over estimated ability
She hopes she will not be at the mercy of every emotion
She hopes she will find healing, unity and completion
There is a distinct absence of memories
No diary detailing the extravagance of life lived so far
No jewellery from her grandmother or mother
No figurines with charming stories of why they were bought
No hand written letters from past lovers
No pictures of her former life
No specific moment worth remembering
On the path to forgetting
She resolves to start a new biography
She resolves to no longer miser painful memories of youth
She resolves to torture herself with happy thoughts
She resolves to hold onto the things she never wants to lose
She resolves to sympathize with future friend’s sufferings and success
She resolves to live a life worth loving
She arrived magically
At a destination where it was enough to do her best
At a destination where the meaning of life is deep breaths after laughing hard
At a destination where other people’s happiness was not essential to her own
At a destination where what she thinks, says and does are in harmony
At a destination where politics have principle
At a destination where food, friendliness and cheer are traded commodities